divorce effect on child essay

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• World Psychiatry
• v.18(1); 2019 Feb

Parental divorce or separation and children's mental health

Brian d'onofrio.

1 Department of Psychological and Brain Sciences, Indiana University, Bloomington, IN, USA

2 Department of Medical Epidemiology and Biostatistics, Karolinska Institutet, Stockholm, Sweden

Robert Emery

3 Department of Psychology, University of Virginia, Charlottesville, VA, USA

An increasing number of children across the world experience family instability due to divorce/separation and the consequences of non‐marital childbearing/cohabitation 1 .

Alternatives to stable marriage are most common in Western countries (including Australia and New Zealand) and less common but growing in industrializing Asia. Cohabitation, which is more unstable than marriage, is especially common in Northern and Western Europe, necessarily lowering rates of divorce but not of single‐parent households.

The US has been a “leader” in family change with an early (rising in the late 1960s) and high increase in divorce, followed by an explosion in non‐marital birth with or without cohabitation. Divorce increased in most other Western nations a decade or two later; industrializing Asia appears to be in the midst of change. Today, only about 60% of US children live with their married, biological parents, a low second only to Latvia.

Some call family instability a major public health problem for children; others see divorce/separation as relatively innocuous, even a positive change, especially for women in unhappy marriages or children exposed to high conflict.

Research has documented that parental divorce/separation is associated with an increased risk for child and adolescent adjustment problems, including academic difficulties (e.g., lower grades and school dropout), disruptive behaviors (e.g., conduct and substance use problems), and depressed mood 2 .

Offspring of divorced/separated parents are also more likely to engage in risky sexual behavior, live in poverty, and experience their own family instability. Risk typically increases by a factor between 1.5 and 2.

Still, most children whose parents divorce are resilient and exhibit no obvious psychological problems. It is important to recognize, however, that even resilient young people from divorced families often report painful feelings or encounters, such as worrying about events like graduations or weddings when both parents will be present 3 .

Many associated risk factors – for example, lower income and parent conflict – are linked with non‐random selection into family stability and/or are consequences of family break‐up. To help rule out potential confounds, researchers have used a variety of methods, including measuring covariates and employing designs, such as children‐of‐twin studies, that account for unmeasured environmental and genetic factors that could influence both generations 2 , 4 . Controls for such confounds reduce but do not eliminate the risk tied to parental divorce, consistent with causal inference.

A wealth of research also points to factors mediating the association, including less effective parenting, interparental conflict, economic struggles, and limited contact with one parent, typically the father (listed in decreasing order of the magnitude of their relation with children's mental health) 5 . Marital instability presents not a single risk factor, but a cascade of sequelae for children.

Individual, family, ethnic and cultural factors moderate the risks associated with changes in children's family life, underscoring the importance of recognizing family diversity. In the US, for example, parental separation is associated with more socioemotional problems among white children than black or Hispanic children 2 . Acceptance of alternatives to marriage and extended family support contribute to such ethnic variation.

Understanding family change and its consequences is critical to health care professionals across numerous settings. Physicians treating children may observe warning signs, be asked to help children cope with family transitions, or face parental disputes about a child's well‐being or needed treatment. Schools encounter similar opportunities and difficulties.

Children and adult offspring of separated parents are over‐represented in the mental health system. Most mental health interventions target the known mediators of risk, such as parenting problems or family conflict. Structured interventions offering parenting support and education have been shown to reduce children's psychological problems 6 . Unfortunately, few mental health interventions for divorcing families have been carefully studied.

Separation/divorce also raises legal concerns bearing on the well‐being and custody of children. The “best interests of children” is the prevailing custody standard, and “best” typically is interpreted in psychological terms (as opposed to, for example, economic ones). Mental health professionals and others may become involved, willingly or unwillingly, as expert witnesses in custody contests. Alternatively, some professionals promote or offer alternative dispute resolution, such as mediation.

Mediators are neutral third parties who help parents living apart to resolve disputes themselves. In addition to dispute settlement, mediation potentially benefits children by lowering conflict, improving parenting, and encouraging both parents to remain an active presence in their children's lives. One randomized trial with a 12‐year follow‐up demonstrated that mediation produced all of these outcomes relative to litigation 5 , 7 . Another randomized study found that carefully involving children in the process improved the success of mediation 7 .

While initial results are promising, mediation and many other legal and mental health interventions demand rigorous study, as well‐intentioned services may have no effect or may even be harmful for some individuals, while wasting limited resources 8 .

Mental health professionals also can play a critical role in advising parents, and perhaps in the development of law and policy. One controversial issue is how strongly, and under what circumstances, to promote joint physical custody, sharing 25‐50% parenting time 9 . Joint legal custody, which involves legally sharing important decisions, including elective medical care, is becoming ubiquitous. It has increased in the US and in many Western countries, but still typically comprises a minority of separated families (from 15 to 50% across countries) 9 . Fathers groups are currently advocating for a universal 50/50 shared time presumption.

While such agreements may benefit numerous families, many experts, including ourselves, worry that such a presumption may offer the “right” solution for the wrong group of parents: the 10% or fewer who contest custody in court 5 . Other concerns we share include avoiding extensive time away from attachment figures among very young children, avoiding placing excessive travel demands on children in order to share parenting time across long distances, whether shared time needs to be precisely 50/50, and if some child mental health problems (e.g., autism spectrum) or personality (e.g., high conscientiousness) make shared custody less likely to work 5 .

There is, therefore, a critical need for studies on interventions, including policy changes, that consider the risks, role of resiliency, and heterogeneity in the consequences associated with family instability.

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How Divorce Affects Children, Age By Age

Learn how divorce impacts children at different developmental stages and how to help them understand and cope at any age.

• Divorce and Babies
• Divorce and Toddlers
• Divorce and Preschoolers
• Divorce and School-Age Kids

Divorce is a big change for a child. When told about the divorce, many children feel sad, angry, or anxious. Some are supportive or even relieved by the news, but may still be uncertain about how their lives or schedules will change. Because nearly three-quarters of divorces take place in the first 13 years of marriage, younger kids are frequently absorbing these impacts.

While there's no telling how any one child will feel about a divorce, their reaction may be influenced by their age. There is no best or worst age for divorce for children, but there are ways to deliver news and handle the logistics of separation according to a child's age and developmental stage. Here's a look at what children comprehend about divorce at different ages, and how you can help them cope during the transition.

Effects of Divorce on Babies (Birth to 18 Months)

Though it may come as a surprise to some, even babies are affected by divorce, especially if parental conflict leads to arguing and tension in the home. During infancy, babies can sense stress in their environment, even if they can't understand the reasoning behind conflicts. If the tension continues, babies may become irritable and clingy , especially around new people, and have frequent emotional outbursts. They may also regress or show signs of developmental delay.

Divorcing parents can ease their baby's transition during and after divorce by creating an emotionally safe environment. Babies require consistency and routine, and they're comforted by familiarity.

Research shows that infants who have frequent overnight visits with a second parent show more signs of attachment insecurity—more anxiety and less trust in caregivers—as they enter childhood. If it's hard to have your baby sleep primarily in one home, be sure to maintain normal daily routines like a sleep schedule and regular meal times during and after the divorce. Provide your child with their favorite toys or security items, and spend extra time holding them and offering physical comfort.

Effects of Divorce on Toddlers (18 Months to 3 Years Old)

Divorce can emotionally and psychologically impact children from ages 18 months to 3 years. During the toddler years, a child's main bond is with their parents, so any major disruption in their home life can be difficult to accept and comprehend. Toddlers whose parents are divorcing may cry and want more attention than usual, regress and return to thumb-sucking, resist toilet training , or have trouble going to sleep or sleeping alone at night.

Parents should consider prioritizing their child's routines to help ease the transition to post-divorce life. If possible, parents should work together to develop normal, predictable routines that their child can easily follow. It's also important to spend quality time with your kid and give them extra attention; ask trusted friends and relatives to do the same.

Try your best to keep your emotions in check in front of your toddler. Research shows that parents who have marital conflicts respond to their children's negative emotions with higher levels of distress, which can lead young children to withdraw emotionally or have more feelings of distress themselves. Help your child name their feelings , read books together, and maintain a calm, measured tone as much as you can.

Effects of Divorce on Preschoolers (3 to 6 Years Old)

Divorce is a difficult concept for children between the ages of 3 and 6 to understand mainly because of the scary level of uncertainty it brings. Preschoolers may understand that their parents aren't getting along but don't understand the notion of divorce and likely won't want their parents to separate—no matter how tense their home environment.

Like toddlers, preschoolers might believe they're ultimately responsible for their parents' separation. They may experience uncertain feelings about the future, keep their anger trapped inside, have unpleasant thoughts or ideas, or have nightmares .

To help kids between the ages of 3 and 6 ease into the transition of divorce, parents should commit to modeling the behavior and attitude they want to see in their children.

Parents should handle the divorce openly and positively, if possible, as preschoolers will reflect their parents' moods and attitudes. They'll likely want to talk with someone and express their feelings, and they may respond well to age-appropriate books about divorce. Kids this age also need to feel safe and secure, knowing they'll continue seeing their non-custodial parent (the one they don't live with) regularly. Set up a regular visitation schedule and consistently adhere to it.

Effects of Divorce on School-Age Children (6 to 11 Years Old)

Divorce may leave school-age kids between the ages of 6 and 11 struggling with feelings of abandonment. Younger elementary schoolers aren't likely to understand the complex reasons why two grown-ups don't want to be married anymore and feel as if their parents are divorcing them . Research suggests that elementary-school-age children may be more likely than older children to feel as if they are to blame for their parents' divorce.

Kids this age may also blame one parent for the separation and align themselves with the "good" parent against the "bad." They may accuse their parents of being mean or selfish and expressing their anger in various ways such as fighting with classmates, lashing out against the world, or becoming anxious , withdrawn, or depressed. For some kids of divorcing parents, schoolwork may suffer, at least temporarily.

Elementary school children can feel extreme loss and rejection during a divorce, but parents can rebuild their child's sense of self-esteem and security. To start, each parent should spend quality time with the child, urging them to open up about their feelings. Reassure them that you won't abandon them, and reiterate that the divorce is not their fault (or just one parent's fault). It's also important to maintain a regular visitation schedule as kids thrive on predictability—particularly during times of turmoil.

Finally, help your child get (or stay) involved with activities they enjoy; school clubs, friendships, and extracurriculars are increasingly important at this age. Encourage them to reach out to others instead of withdrawing from the world.

The impact of family structure on the health of children: Effects of divorce . Linacre Quarterly . 2014.

Helping Children and Families Deal with Divorce and Separation . Pediatrics . 2016.

Stress and Child Development . The Future of Children . 2014.

Overnight Custody Arrangements, Attachment, and Adjustment Among Very Young Children . Journal of Marriage and Family . 2013.

Marital conflict and parental responses to infant negative emotions: Relations with toddler emotional regulation . Infant and Behavior Development . 2015.

Helping Preschoolers and Elementary-Age Children Adjust to Divorce . University of Missouri . 2016.

Impact of parental separation or divorce on school performance in preterm children: A population-based study . PLoS One . 2018.

Children and Divorce . American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry . 2017.

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The Effects Of Divorce On Children

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Effects of Divorce on Child Development

Divorce is a harrowing experience for a growing child. Breaking of marital bond affects every area of a child’s life. Children divided from one of their parents suffer trauma that affects their education, behavior, and mental health (Sondre et al., 2020). Divorce can also cause children to feel a lack of control over their lives, leading to helplessness and hopelessness. Divorce can profoundly affect the mental, behavioral, and educational development of children of all ages. It is essential to understand the potential impacts of divorce on a child’s development so that parents can support and guide their children. Studies have shown that divorce negatively affects a child’s development throughout the year. Therefore, this paper analyzes the effects of post-divorce on a child’s education, behavior, and mental health.

When parents divorce, children suffer trauma that disrupts their education life. With conflicts at home, children struggle to concentrate on their studies. Children may feel a sense of loss, confusion, and sadness, making paying attention difficult (Nusinovici et al., 2018). Divorce depresses a child’s autonomy, motivation, and manual aptitude, causing them to fall back academically. Children who relocate after their parents separated often become poor academically (Sondre et al., 2020). Educational achievement of children whose parents had a divorce unmotivated. Children may experience academic difficulties due to the stress and emotional upheaval caused by their parent’s separation. They may need help to concentrate or lose interest in school altogether. In some cases, children may miss school or experience a decline in their grades. Additionally, financial strain resulting from the divorce can limit a child’s access to resources and opportunities, making it harder to succeed academically.

Divorce is a life transition that stresses all family members. Children may experience intense sadness, anxiety, and anger and often display rowdy behavior such as acting out, aggression, and difficulty concentrating. Children may withdraw from social activities and isolate themselves from peers and friends. They may feel embarrassed or ashamed about their family situation. Children may also exhibit aggressive behavior towards siblings, peers, or adults due to the stress and anxiety caused by the divorce (Nusinovici et al., 2018). They may struggle to understand why their parents are separating and feel helpless, scared, or abandoned. Causes of this stress may result from financial instability and less time spent with one of the parents.Divorce diminishes a child’s future competence in all areas of life (Ross & Wynne, 2010). Children in divorce situations lack the feeling of satisfaction and hope.

Post-divorce marital conflict increases depressive symptoms among all family members. Children adopt a withdrawal behavior toward their family, causing loneliness, stress, and anxiety. Mostly father-child bonds tend to loosen after marriage breakups (Kalmijn, 2016).Research proves that most children live stressfully and with mental difficulties from anxiety and depression (Ross & Wynne, 2010). They may also feel guilty or responsible for the divorce. This can lead to depression, anxiety, and other emotional problems. Children of conflicting parents often have difficulty with impulse control and emotional regulation, which can lead to further behavioral issues. Depressed parents are emotionally unstable, hostile, and withdrawn. Children are often scolded and disregarded by their troubled parents leading to anxiety and depression among their offspring (Ross & Wynne, 2010).

Depending on various factors, divorce can have short-term and long-term effects on child development. Contextually, the child’s age, the quality of the parent’s relationship, and the conflict and stress surrounding the divorce. Divorce can sometimes remove children from high-conflict and stressful environments. A peaceful environment is crucial to a child’s overall well-being. Additionally, divorce can provide children with opportunities to develop resilience and coping skills as they learn to adapt to new situations and navigate changing family dynamics. However, research proves that divorce does more harm than good. Family separation due to conflict is unhealthy for all family members.

Finally, providing children with time to adjust to the changes is essential. Though divorce can be difficult for children, they can adapt successfully, given the proper support and guidance. By understanding the potential impacts of divorce on children’s development, parents can take steps to ensure that their children can cope with the changes and continue to grow and thrive. It is important to note that every child’s divorce experience differs, and not all children will exhibit these behavioral changes. Parents can support their children through divorce by providing emotional support, maintaining routines, and seeking professional help. With the proper support, children emerge from a divorce situation strong, resilient, and hopeful.

Gustavsen, G. W., Nayga, R. M., & Wu, X. (2016). Effects of parental divorce on teenage children’s risk behaviors: incidence and persistence.  Journal of Family and Economic Issues ,  37 (3), 474–487. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10834-015-9460-5

Kalmijn, M. (2016). Father-child contact, interparental conflict, and depressive symptoms among children of divorced parents. European Sociological Review, 32(1), 68–80. https://doi.org/10.1093/esr/jcv095

Nusinovici, S., Olliac, B., Flamant, C., Müller, J., Olivier, M., Rouger, V., Gascoin, G., Basset, H., Bouvard, C., Jean-Christophe Rozé, & Hanf, M. (2018). Impact of parental separation or divorce on school performance in preterm children: A population-based study.  PLoS One, 13 (9) https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0202080

Ross, L. T., & Wynne, S. (2010). Parental depression and divorce and adult children’s well-being: the role of family unpredictability. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 19(6), 757–761.

Sondre, A. N., Breivik, K., Wold, B., Kristin Gärtner Askeland, Sivertsen, B., Hysing, M., & Bøe, T. (2020). Divorce and adolescent academic achievement: Heterogeneity in the associations by parental education.  PLoS One, 15 (3). https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0229183

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Effects of Divorce on Children essay

From the past to present, people all over the world have been determined to live together, which is called “marriage” in another word, so that they depend on for living with each other. Nevertheless, some couples are unable to maintain their relationship; therefore they choose divorce, which is one of the solutions to cope with problems between husband and wife. Furthermore, most people think carefully before they get marriage. However, the divorce rates trend to continually increase nowadays, thus it might be argued that divorces can be taken place easier than the past.

There are three main causes of divorce: changing woman’s roles, stress in modern living and lack of communication, which are highlighted below. The first significant cause of recent rise in the rates of divorce is that women completely change in roles. In the past, men have to earn whole money to afford the expense of family, whereas woman only do housework, hence women have no money leading to depend on husbands’ money. Because of these situations, it is too difficult for most women to separate from their husbands. Nonetheless, these situations entirely change nowadays.

The equality between men and women in roles are very clear at the moment, thus women can work outside to earn money, while men share the household tasks such as cooking, cleaning, washing as well as caring for children. It can be clearly seen that women are independent from money as they can earn money by them to support their living cost. Accordingly, the divorce rates rise. Another cause to confirm the recent increase in divorce rates is stress in modern living. Many people, who live in globalization, have considerable pressures to earn money.

It can be obviously seen that the stress has occurred since they are children. For instance, in Thailand, students generally want to go to famous school so that they take advantage to go to well-known universities. Studying in celebrated universities mostly causes having a good opportunity to find a job or earn a lot of money. This circumstance not only happens in Thailand, but also occurs in many countries. Some people are laid off from their companies; consequently the stress occurs in their family, which leads to divorce.

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Some families can earn money, but inadequate for covering their expenses, therefore it is easy to think about divorce. Nevertheless, the rates of unemployment trend to continually increase as a result the divorce rates can also rise. It is no doubt that the stress in modern living may lead to recently increasing divorce rates. The final cause of recently increasing divorce is lack of communication. Owing to financial status in each family, many people are fairly busy. For this reason, they have no time to talk to the problems with their partners, which produces the likelihood of divorce.

Some couples are often quiet when they have problems each other, as a consequence little problems can be expanded to probably become huge problems, resulting in divorce. It is obvious that the more communications are used, the more divorce rates are reduced. Although, these three causes of the recent rise in divorce rates are expressed above, there are also two effects of the recent increase of divorce rates: negative effects and positive affects Firstly, the effects of recent enlargement in divorce rates are negative effects. Most couples normally have children when they get married.

Children often try to stop the divorce of their parents, but there are many who seem to accept it at first. These who seem to accept it may even tell their parents that they are happy about the divorce. This is not always the case, as one would see if he or she spoke with the child for a while. There are many things that divorce does to a family, and there are many things that is does to the child. These effects are rarely positive or helpful depending upon the family’s prior situation. Divorce has many negative effects on the psychological and social aspects of a child’s life.

There are many psychological aspects of a child’s life that change when his or her parents go through a divorce. As previously mentioned by the writer, a child may not show initially how he or she feels about the divorce, but the true feelings of that child eventually surface. Joan B. Kelly, in an article for the Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry says, Children incorporate repertoires of angry, impulsive, and violent behavior into their own behavior as a result of observing their parents’ responses to frustration and rage.

This is something that many children that witness the divorce of their parents go through. The child naturally looks to his or her parent or parents for the example of how to handle certain situations and emotions. During a divorce there is much anger and aggression that is expressed by one or both parents of that child. This is not healthy for the child to witness for several reasons. One of the main reasons is that the child sees this example of aggression that his or her parents are setting, and he or she begins to react in the same manner.

Anger and aggression tend to become the child’s tools for solving his or her problems. The child becomes like the parents and could cause harm to others because of not knowing or understanding how to control these feelings. He or she may often violently lash out at those around him or her that cause these feelings to occur. This leads to the next psychological effect that divorce has on children. Depression is a major effect that divorce has on children. This is not necessarily something that occurs during the divorce, but has major effects on the later life of the child.

A high level of marital conflict experienced during childhood has been linked to more depression and other psychological disorders in young adults, compared with those reporting lower levels of family conflict during childhood. Lora Heims Tessman, author of Children of Parting Parents says, “most of the adolescents were overly depressed . . . many had conscious suicidal thoughts . . . a minority showed increased acting out with self-destructive components, but without anxious depression” (Tessman 327). These are common psychological effects of divorce on children. There are also many social effects that divorce has on children.

The child often feels unconnected to his or her peers. He or she feels unable to make or maintain friendships and complained about being unconnected to his or her peers. Also contributing to feeling unconnected to their peers is that in numerous studies over the past three decades, divorced children have been reported to be more aggressive and impulsive and to engage in more antisocial behaviors, compared with matched samples of never-divorced children. The divorce that these children experience causes them to act and react in ways that are not considered socially acceptable, and distancing themselves from their peers.

Diagnostically, the adolescents varied greatly, but did share a number of clinical features. The children of these divorced families have become so mixed up that they do not know who they are any longer. Things that they once loved or enjoyed things that they were once interested in no longer matter to them. In conclusion, a family is one of the important parts of society, thus many people had better be aware of the significance of relationship in family. At the moment, divorce has become the substantial problem because of changing women’s roles, stress in modern living and lack of communication.

Nevertheless, there are also the two different ways in effects, which are negative and positive effects. Some couples, which have no children, divorce by consent, therefore divorce should be good solution for couples to deal with this problem. On the other hand, some couples having children in their family should think deliberatively before they end their marriage with divorce otherwise innocent children probably become victims of this situation. Although people tend to think carefully before they get married and until then the divorce rate will continuously rise.

Divorce and its Impacts on Family Members Cause and Effect Essay

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Introduction

Impacts of divorce, how divorced spouses cope with the divorce.

Divorce has become a common aspect of our society. Current divorce statistics have been estimated to be 50% in America. This portrays a society where people are moving from a situation where family institutions were used as refugees and comfort zones to a one where they are viewed as a place of doom and suffering.

We cannot deny that divorce has devastating and far reaching effects than we are ready to admit. This paper looks into the impacts of divorce to the various members of the broken marriage, and how they try to live through it.

The effects of divorce are experienced by each and every member of the family regardless of who was at fault.

“The effects of divorce can change virtually every aspect of a person’s life including where a person lives, with whom they live with, their standard of living, their emotional happiness, their assets and liabilities, time spent with children and other family…” (eJustice 2002),

Effects of divorce to couples themselves

Even though the couple is the author of the outcome of the marriage, it does not affect them any less. The effects are on all aspects of life i.e., socially, financially, and psychologically.

Socially, individuals relations with the outside is influenced by the persons failed marriage. “Divorced individuals generally experience more social isolation and have smaller social networks than do married individuals” (Henley & Parsley, 2011).

This may result from self pity and feelings of inadequacy that may be developed by the individual in question. Further, there are societies where divorced people are viewed as failures and are allocated a lower social standing as compared to married people. In such traditional societies, divorced people and especially women are not allowed to remarry. So they may end up spending their lives in solitude and unhappy.

Moreover, even where it is completely allowed to remarry, “remarriages are less stable than first marriages…Therefore; divorce appears to influence future marital relationships, making them less stable and more vulnerable to dissolution” (Henley & Parsley, 2011).

Economically, a person’s normal life is disrupted and normally one of the couple may have to establish a home elsewhere, which requires funds. Further, divorce legal proceedings can be quite expensive, to hire lawyers and paying witnesses not to mention countless hours spent in courtrooms. In addition, the property accumulated during the subsistence of the marriage is ordinarily split up between the couple and these lowers the standards of living from both ends.

Sometimes, a couple may be unable to obtain judicial help in determining property ownership leaving weaker party, especially women, under the mercy of the other couple. This normally causes unfairness where the party refuses to divide the property in his possession fairy, not to mention hiding some of the property, leaving the other party financially starved.

Researchers have reached a conclusion that there is a disparity between the economic situation of women and that of men after divorce, with women generally being on the lower edge while men experiencing an economic upsurge (Braver and O’Connell 1998).

Psychologically, research has revealed that divorced people portray higher rates of anxiety and depression, low self-esteem and psychological instability, with those having more than one divorce experiences exhibiting more of these tendencies as compared to those with one.

Researchers has it that those who stay married, even though they were unhappy before, are likely to be happier five years later in the marriage as opposed to those who opted for divorce (Waite & Gallagher 2000, P. 148).

The psychological impact causes health implications to the couple. It has been shown that both spouses will greatly suffer a decline in mental health but this may affect women more than men. Further, a couple diagnosed with a terminal illness is more likely to recover within the marriage as compared to a divorced individual (Goodwin et al 1987, P. 3125-3130).

This shows that there are deeper issues associated with divorce besides the financial hurdles and social effects.

Impacts to Children

Divorce has profound implications on the children of the marriage. This is regardless of whether they are adult children or otherwise. Study has shown that divorce has serious implications on development of children and affects their future relationships. These effects may be discussed in terms of what the child has to lose resulting from the divorce. These may include such things as economic loss, lack of parental care and other social disruptions.

Economically, since children are moving from an institution where there are two breadwinners to, in most cases, one-breadwinner family it is normal that the financial status will have to be adjusted to suite the new family setting. This will mean cutting costs to incorporate all the needs of the family to the now constrained family budget.

In extreme cases, where the single parent is unemployed and without a stable source of income, the children may be forced to survive without basic necessities. It has been established that, “[children] in single-parent families have less than one-third the median per capita income of kids from two-parent families, and half of them fall below the poverty line in any given year, compared with 10% of their counterparts in intact families” (Magnet 1992, p 43)

Parental factor has various aspects to it. First of all, divorced parents will no longer live together. The children who were used to being with both parents will have to live with one of them. Adjusting to these new casual relationships between parents may pose problems to most children.

Mostly the children grow up without having the fatherly input in their lives. For children below 5 years, “sleep disturbances and an exacerbated fear of separation from the custodial parent are common. There is usually a great deal of yearning for the non-custodial parent” (Eleoff 2003).

It was concluded that youth of around 20 years still carry around with them painful memories ten years after their parents’ divorce. Billings and Emery (2000) among the things that still weigh down on them is the loss of the relationship with their fathers.

Further, the parent bestowed with the custody of the children may not be very effective on his/her own on the over burdened parental obligation. It could be the ordinary imperfections of a parent or it could have arisen from the after-effects of the divorce process. As argued out before, the psychological stability of the parent may be in question, and this is transmitted to the children, albeit unknowingly.

“In the wake of a divorce, most custodial mothers exhibit varying degrees of disorganization, anger, decreased expectations for appropriate social behavior of their children, and a reduction of the ability of parents to separate the child’s needs and actions from those of the adult” (Eleoff 2003).

The other issue on parents is the fact that, after divorce, parents will remarry and the children will have a different set of parents, step parents. Obviously, the step family will not function as naturally as a normal family does.

More often than not, there will be conflicts of loyalties between step parent and biological parent for the child. “Evidence suggests that each change in parenting arrangements represents a risk factor, thus increasing the likelihood that a child will react negatively to their post-divorce environment”(Demo & Supple 2011).

Social disruptions involve such things as moving houses, changing schools and having adapting new and very different surrounding for the child. Sometimes, it means that the new surroundings are worse off than the one the child is used to. This may be due to financial strains on the single parent.

Study has shown that, constant moving for children of single parent families, increased school drop-outs and chances of unplanned pregnancies. (Crowder and Teachman 2004)

When these children move from their original home and schools, they lose their friends and are forced to start all over again in life, a situation that most children have a problem adjusting to.

Overall, children experience such internal and emotional conflicts as low self-esteem, unfamiliarity to the new surroundings and set of parents, feelings of rejection especially from the parent who is not living with them and feelings of hopelessness and insecurity.

Despite the devastating impacts of a divorce, all the members have to find a way of surviving the divorce. Some of the factors that help family members cope may be economical, social or personal factors.

Personal factors have to do with the personal attributes that are specific to an individual. They include such matters as age, level of education, financial security and psychological stability. Research shows that older people are less likely to cope with a divorce as compared to younger people owing to their impaired chances of remarriage and due the comfort they have established in the marriage all those years.

Also, a person who is financially stable will be more likely to adjust to new family set-up as opposed to people who are unemployed. This is made stronger by the now widely adopted principle of property settlement between spouses, which requires a 50-50 property division. This ensures that both spouses’ living standards are least affected by the divorce.

Also, parties will seek to establish new social networks for support. Some spouses will start new romantic relationships or even remarry so as to forget their former spouses as well as help in the hardships of day to day living.

Divorce is a horrible ordeal to go through. The post-divorce experiences are beyond devastation, both to the members of the family involved and to the society at large. Parties should try to resolve their disputes before rushing for divorce and it should only be a last resort.

Many studies have been done on the level divorce with statistics showing that they are currently very high. However, there hasn’t been conclusive research on what are the causes of this rapidly increasing pandemic or even on how it could be stopped.

Therefore, future studies should concentrate more on how we can combine efforts to reduce the occurrence of more divorces. It is a duty and responsibility of each and every member of the society to uphold and protect the sanctity of the institution of the marriage.

Braver, S. L and O’Connell, D. (1998) Divorced Dads: Shattering the Myths. New York: Putnam.

Billings, L & Emery, R. E. (2000). Distress among young adults in divorced families: Journal of Family Psychology , 14, 671-687.

Crowder, K & Teachman, J. (2004). Do residential conditions explain the relationship between living arrangements and adolescent behavior? Journal of Marriage and Family , 66, 721-738.

Eleoff, S. (2003). An Exploration of the Ramifications of Divorce on Children and Adolescent: The Pennsylvania, State University College of Medicine eJustice.

Goodwin, S et al. (1987). The Effect of Marital Status on Stage, Treatment, and Survival of Cancer Patients; Journal of the American Medical Association 258: 3125-3130.

Henley, K & Pasley, K. (2011). Divorce- Effects On Children, Effects On Couples, Effects On Parents: Effects on couples .

Magnet, M. (1992). The American Family : Fortune 10 Aug: 42-47.

Waite, L & Gallagher, M. ( 2000). The Case for Marriage. New York: Doubleday p.148.

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3 Signs of Going Through an "Emotional Divorce"

Signing legal papers isn't the only way to feel the effects of a divorce..

Posted August 15, 2024 | Reviewed by Michelle Quirk

• The Challenges of Divorce
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• Emotional divorce is when a couple, still legally married, experiences a significant emotional separation.
• In an emotional divorce, a couple can experience fear, relief, sadness, anger, hope, or even personal growth.
• Lack of communication creates an emotional chasm, making a couple more like roommates than life partners.

An “emotional divorce” refers to when a couple, although still legally married, experiences a significant emotional separation. This situation often precedes a legal divorce but can also occur independently.

In an emotional divorce, partners become increasingly emotionally disconnected from one another, leading to a lack of intimacy , communication, or mutual support. Couples may live together but lead separate lives, with little to no shared activities, goals , or interests.

In the process of an emotional divorce, research shows that a couple can experience fear , relief, sadness, anger , hope, or even personal growth in varying degrees, often based on who initiates the separation.

A 2023 study found that emotional divorces can also be associated with alexithymia—a difficulty in identifying and connecting with one’s emotions—and possibly depression . These mental health impacts on both individuals and their marriages highlight the importance of catching the signs early and addressing them before they escalate.

Following are three signs of an emotional divorce:

1. A Lack of Communication

A study published in March on late-life divorces found that emotional divorces often set in long before formal ones. Based on the participants’ experiences of growing apart while still married, a lack of communication is one of the most telling signs of an emotional divorce.

Partners may stop sharing their thoughts, feelings, aspirations, and daily experiences with each other. Conversations become superficial and cold, limited to necessary topics such as household chores, their children’s well-being, or finances.

The warmth and affection that once characterized their interactions are replaced by detachment and indifference. Nonverbal cues such as eye contact, touch, and attentive body language that signify connection and affection can also noticeably diminish.

“At some point it was even cold between us. A distance began to form. We no longer had the usual topics of conversation. I focused on my pleasures, she on her work and our relationship was through the children. The divorce was essentially a final stop in a process that had started years before,” says Dan, a 69-year-old participant from the study, recalling the emotional divorce that took place with his ex long before legal proceedings began.

A lack of communication creates an emotional chasm between partners, making them operate more like roommates than life partners. This can create feelings of anxiety and loneliness , even when physically together.

2. A Loss of Intimacy

In strained marriages, physical affection and sexual activity can significantly decline or cease entirely. Emotionally divorced couples also tend to experience very low levels of emotional intimacy, often due to underlying emotional disconnection, incompatibility, a lack of attraction , or unresolved conflicts.

A 2021 study found that when we perceive our partners as caring and responsive to our needs, we experience greater intimacy, which can enhance relationship satisfaction. However, emotional divorces can involve the loss of a deep connection, closeness, trust, mutual understanding, emotional availability, and responsiveness between partners.

After facing multiple relationship challenges without successful resolutions, spouses may become indifferent to each other’s needs, feelings, and well-being and stop putting effort into maintaining the relationship. This can further fuel feelings of neglect and perpetuate negative cycles of being emotionally dismissive of each other.

3. Heightened Levels of Destructive Conflict

Emotional divorces often involve heightened levels of conflict, with couples unable to resolve them or giving up after multiple failed attempts. Over time, these unresolved conflicts foster resentment and hostility. Partners may begin to avoid each other to prevent any further friction, creating further emotional distance.

“We were dragged into endless arguments about who is right, what word was said, in what tone it was said, and what it means, and what punishment is due for it. It was exhausting to the point that in the last eight or nine years, I tried as much as possible not to talk, be in a separate room and live my life,” explains Ruth, another participant from the 2024 late-life divorce study.

According to Gottman’s theory of “the four horsemen” of divorce, four destructive behaviors in a conflict can signal the end of a marriage : criticism or attacking a partner’s character; contempt, which involves a lack of respect and sarcasm; defensiveness, which entails refusing to take responsibility for one’s behavior; and stonewalling, which involves withdrawing and refusing to communicate.

Without open communication, misunderstandings and assumptions become more frequent. Partners may begin to doubt each other’s intentions, leading to suspicion and insecurity. Over time, the emotional toll of constant conflicts and unmet needs can also lead to emotional exhaustion, leaving little room for positive interactions.

A 2018 study found that when both spouses take their problems seriously, it reduces the risk of separation. However, in emotional divorces, they may feel too worn out to do so, making reconciliation increasingly difficult.

Additionally, research shows that spouses often stay together, locked in a long period of emotional divorce because their relationships have both positive and negative elements, making it difficult to end them or to continue in the face of struggles.

Realizing that you’re in an emotional divorce is not a death sentence for your relationship but an opportunity to reflect on what you, your partner, and your children, if any, would truly benefit from.

No one wins if even one partner is unhappy in a marriage. While emotional divorces can be challenging and painful, addressing the dissatisfaction is the first step toward preparing oneself to move on from an unfulfilling relationship or healing and rebuilding a stronger, more connected bond with your partner.

A version of this post also appears on Forbes.com.

Mark Travers, Ph.D., is an American psychologist with degrees from Cornell University and the University of Colorado Boulder.

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Britain’s Violent Riots: What We Know

Officials had braced for more unrest on Wednesday, but the night’s anti-immigration protests were smaller, with counterprotesters dominating the streets instead.

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By Lynsey Chutel

After days of violent rioting set off by disinformation around a deadly stabbing rampage, the authorities in Britain had been bracing for more unrest on Wednesday. But by nightfall, large-scale anti-immigration demonstrations had not materialized, and only a few arrests had been made nationwide.

Instead, streets in cities across the country were filled with thousands of antiracism protesters, including in Liverpool, where by late evening, the counterdemonstration had taken on an almost celebratory tone.

Over the weekend, the anti-immigration protests, organized by far-right groups, had devolved into violence in more than a dozen towns and cities. And with messages on social media calling for wider protests and counterprotests on Wednesday, the British authorities were on high alert.

With tensions running high, Prime Minister Keir Starmer’s cabinet held emergency meetings to discuss what has become the first crisis of his recently elected government. Some 6,000 specialist public-order police officers were mobilized nationwide to respond to any disorder, and the authorities in several cities and towns stepped up patrols.

Wednesday was not trouble-free, however.

In Bristol, the police said there was one arrest after a brick was thrown at a police vehicle and a bottle was thrown. In the southern city of Portsmouth, police officers dispersed a small group of anti-immigration protesters who had blocked a roadway. And in Belfast, Northern Ireland, where there have been at least four nights of unrest, disorder continued, and the police service said it would bring in additional officers.

But overall, many expressed relief that the fears of wide-scale violence had not been realized.

Here’s what we know about the turmoil in Britain.

Where arrests have been reported

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